Sunday, September 11, 2005

Home Alone

Home Alone!!

This morning, my youngest daughter left home to go live in California. She left ahead of me, getting into school and a job before I get out there. She was excited but a little nervous. I don’t blame her. I am staying behind while she is braving a new world alone. I’m so proud of her. I also understand her feelings. It’s a big world out there and she will definitely be challenged to make new friends, to judge them to be good friends, to find a new job, and to settle into school ok.

My fiancĂ©e is totally excited about her getting out there. I kind of see it like this: he’s been alone for quite a while and now he will have someone there living with him. Someone he can cook dinner for, help take care of if needed, watch tv and go to movies with her, shop with her. He’s looking forward to “having a daughter” around. He never had a daughter, he only had boys, so he’s in for a treat! Afterall, I think my daughter is AWESOME!  He’ll enjoy just having some companionship. And I’ll be coming along shortly.

So, in the meantime, I’ll be home alone! I’ve never been home alone before without living with someone. I’ve either had roommates, boyfriend, husband, kids, or parents. I will probably like it, but this morning, I didn’t like it very much. I cried at the airport without her knowing it, while I watched her walk through security. I watched her as long as I could see her, which was until she walked through the metal detector. She made it through just fine, I watched her pick up her bags and then I couldn’t see her any longer. I stood there and realized that I was all alone.

My son is out of town, but will be back on the 21st, however, he is living with a friend in an apartment. My oldest daughter lives on her own. It’s just me and the cat and the grass growing.  

I am nervous and won’t be satisfied until I hear from her safely on the ground in Fresno, in his truck on her way to the house. Her flight to Fresno is in flight, so she’ll be there in about an hour.

I’m off to cut the grass while I’m waiting to hear from both of them. Wow, just think, I have had her with me for nearly 19 years and in an instant, she’s gone and living with him…isn’t life strange???

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